i heart u lahhh =)

here comes niny nai , after two months menyepi . she gets dissapointed with the internet line here in puncak..dats one of the reason why she didnt update her blog for like 2 months. but now, niny nai is forcing her every muscles from the triceps to the biceps just to update her blog. it sounds weird, i know.

at this time , she is supposed to sit down and flip her Commercial Law books [this coming saturday is her final exam for this paper ], but then she turned out to act the opposite way. she is now facing her housemate's [fain] lappy , because she needs to , i mean like seriously need to update her blog. she is willing to sacrifice her study time just to update her blog . even if she didnt, she would probably end up sleeping with those books , or perhaps staring at her phones, waiting for any incoming calls..

but then it will all be useless. so thats why she's here...trying to solve her problems in an immediate time..whatever it is, lets get back to the real story. she wanted to call her 'love' , but then when she thought back, it will only make the probs even worse. so she wrote a letter to her 'love' hoping that the probs will be settled. last night , she felt like pulling the trigger and ended it. but she knew she couldnt do so. the words "you have to end this, you HAVE TO " kept on popping inside her head last night. at last , she cried to sleep . this is what she wrote :

Dear Mohd Eqbal bin Ab Rahim ,

i am writing this for u hoping that u would accept my apology. this is the only way for me to seek forgiveness , im afraid to call u because i know i will cry and whatever things that i wish to say will all be gone just like that. so to be safe, i put it black and white.

im sorry for acting like an annoying little kid just now.
i have reached 19 but still, acting like a stupid kid who force her mother to buy her a lollipop when her mother got no money to buy it.

i did say a few harsh words to u , but honestly i didnt mean it..not a single word..i should have just be patient and relaxed , but then my involuntary action has put us into a fight .

i admit that it was all my fault . u never issued any probs, it was me all the time. i am the one who always put us into a fight..

to be exact,i am the trouble maker.yes!i am YOUR trouble maker.if it wasnt me,this whole thing would never exist. what kind of a girlfriend i am.

u always have probs with ur works,ur projects,ur lecturers [ serioussly i hate this kind of lecturers], and lots more, but with my existence, ur probs will always be doubled.

im sorry for not being a good gf of yours. if there's an award for being 'the best gf' , i know i will never win . in fact , i will be disqualified.

whatever things that u said to me, advised me, it is all for my own good.. not many man can do those especially nowadays..because i see it with my own two eyes, and yes, u're like a limited edition for me..

i am very lucky to have you in my life..i will never forgive myself if i ever lose u..im deeeeply sorry for all my wrongdoings...

i accept every bits of ur weaknesses..with all my heart and soul..i want to be with u all the time, wish to meet u everyday..and with that,

I AM SORRY SAYANG

and

I MISS YOU SO DAMN MUCH

..i dedicated this song to you,bcuz this song keeps on playing in my mind when i wrote this..papa introduced me to this song when i was 16..n now,i will introduce
it to u..because u're my only squirtle,otomen,king,kura2, and tott :D

with lots of pure love,

ur jigglypuff,queen, and ming2 ;D

and this one too